We all get frustrated when things go wrong in our lives. It's how we deal with these instances that are important. Setbacks should be an opportunity to learn something. They sometimes end up just being a chance to throw a fit.
We should look at disappointing circumstances as an opportunity to learn what we could have done better or different, or maybe we learned to not trust a certain person that we did to help us with something. Sometimes we can't control anything in a certain situation and have to learn that we can't control every little thing in the world and have to learn to just say, "Oh, well, I did my best, and I couldn't have done anything better or differently that would have made a difference in the outcome", and just let it go.
Every now and then, things just don't turn out as we'd like them to. It happens to everyone. We all get disappointed now and then, and it's then that we should examine our expectations. Was it our expectations that led us to believe that something was going to be more grand or fun or fruitful than it actually turned out to be? If so, then we set ourselves up for disappointment. Our feelings of frustration are understandable as well as any of anger or disappointment. We are human and that is going to happen. We need to look at each upset and examine whether we are blowing it out of proportion, or maybe if we are diminishing it's importance only to have it come back to haunt us later. We need to learn to take things as they are, not how we want them to be.
Avoid comparing yourself to others. That's the fastest way to beat up on yourself! Everyone has their own unique gifts and talents. We all do not share the same talents. If you compare your weak areas to the strong areas in another person, then you're going to feel inferior. That's how attacks on others start and how we talk ourselves out of developing our own talents, because we'd never be as good as so-and-so.
Some self-help gurus train their followers that life is a competition. That in order to come out on top we have to be ruthless and competitive and shove others out of our way to get what we want. I say, and so have a lot of other spiritual leaders, that is the 100% wrong way to go about life! We are all in this boat together. If we step on everyone on our way up, then we will be lonely at the top. We should look at life as a big cake.
Sure, we could hog it all ourselves, and feel fuller, and waste some of it when it gets stale, but wouldn't it be nicer to invite our fellows in to have a piece and share the goodness of it? I met a man that I had to work with once, who was so competitive that no one wanted to turn their back on him, because they knew as soon as they did, there would be his knife sticking out of it. Maybe he was trained that it was okay to do that to get what he wanted. A lot of people do that. We all know people who behave like they know everything, even though we know they don't.
By monopolizing conversations and trying to tell us things that we already know, or that we know more about than they do, so we know that they are wrong, while they think they are coming off as superior, we can see through all the hot air and know that their superiority is masking their feelings of inferiority. I pity them because until they get enough help to feel secure in their selves, they feel that they have to attack us to feel good. 1 is a lonely number. In a competition in real life, no one wins because someone's going to get hurt and someone's wrong thinking and skewed views of the world may be reinforced if they do "win".
We should be educated as to who our teachers are. Why they believe what they believe. Was it from decades of study, or did a thing happen to them once, and now they base their whole teaching model on one experience? Hurt people teach hurting others. People who have found love for themselves, teach love for others. We should never follow someone blindly. We should research them and read enough of their "doctrine" to get a feel for where they're coming from. We should be concerned with how they fit into our beliefs. We should never change our core person to fit into someone else's mold. We should be our number1 teacher. We will need help in the beginning to find who we are, and what we want out of life, but when we have that knowledge, we can't be led astray so easily.
By educating ourselves on what our motives and expectations are, we can help avoid future disappointments and setting ourselves up for them. By knowing who we are and what we want, we won't compare ourselves to others and we won't feel the need to use others as stepping stones. By listening to our inner voice and the voice that is our guiding compass in this world, we won't be led astray by people who don't really have our best interests at heart, people who may be trying to recreate in your life what went out of control in theirs. By helping your own personal education, your journey will be smoother for us all. When you create your own reality, it also rubs up against others' realities remember. We are all in this together.
ONLY ONE CHANCE
Here lies the hoping cross-road
Only one chance on alive
All must pay the price we hold
Just this jump on alive
Take the horse and run along
Its only now for today
There stands nothing wrong in plunging along
Take the bull by the horn onward you may
It’s your time no tomorrow
Can’t turn the hand of time
So many things you follow but yourself
Can’t live fine without your line
Only one chance for this life
Take it or leave it you may
But the future lies plying to fight
This is your time and days
Salau O John©
MY WORDS
I am but nothing fought
But my words in print did prevailed
I have been counted to be naught
But I sent my words unveiled
I may not make it there
But my words did it without fear
The world boo, bars and mars me
But happy I am in Gods light free
I know that I’ll make it there
If my words could without fear and care
It’s only a matter of time in God’s plan
I was made not only to stare but also to be there
There’s a place made for all men
Through works, words or wisdom in luck
Our ways do differ for growth in many ways
If I can, you can with Gods trust-tuck
Salau O John©
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