Turning hate into good

In many ways we all do have something to hate here and there about life, our job, people and things but the actuality of understanding brings us to try and live with some of these hates to make us a better person even in the midst of not feeling happy about our character at the time.

There's nothing bad in having a little hate for something but learning to manage that hate is another thing for us all.

How many times have we said to ourselves “I hate this or that” or even “ I hate him/her”, but where does hate get us, does it make us feel any better by declaring we hate something or somebody? Hate is a negative feeling and negative feelings only bring about bad. When we think of the word hate we start to have thoughts of coldness towards others or something, we automatically isolate ourselves from that person or situation and nothing good can come from feelings such as these. There are many types of hate such as racial, sexual, ethnicity or just plain disliking a situation or disliking a situation due to a phobia, here are some ways you can think about turning the hatred into a more positive and good approach.

Racial hate
People are people, we are all flesh and blood whatever the colour of our skin or our background in life, we all have the same color blood flowing through our veins; we have the same shape hearts and brains, we all have fingers, toes and the ability to communicate. Why then do so many people profess to hate someone else just because they have a different color skin or come from a different country? It is worthwhile remembering that underneath we are all basically the same and want the same out of life for ourselves and our families, there are good and bad people of all colors and nationalities in life.

So instead of just hating someone because the look differently to you look deeper inside than the color of the skin and see the true person.

Sexual hate
What difference does a person’s sexual preference make to the person that they are, many people hate others solely based on their sexual preference, but why? For example you could meet someone quite by chance enjoy being in their company, laugh, talk have a great time until you found out that they were gay or lesbian.

All of a sudden your feelings alter towards this person yet nothing has substantially changed from a few minutes ago, the person hasn’t changed, they are still the same person you were having fun with whom you liked being with, yet this simple point changes everything. Maybe its just a matter of ethics, how you were brought up, what you were brought up to believe in, but why cant you change your thoughts and feelings, why cant you just allow yourself to continue having fun and enjoying being with that person?

If they were a good person before there admittance of their sexual preference then they still are now.

Hate due to a phobia
People can truly hate certain situations or objects in life due to an excessive phobia, this could be a hate of heights, spiders, snakes, the dentist or being enclosed in elevators. This type of hate is brought about by fear, a deep fear of something or situation that for those affected have hardly any or no control over, however since fear is all about feelings and thoughts, fear and hate of this type can be controlled with the mind with a little help and know how. An analyst can help to turn this type of hate and fear into a more positive outlook and help the person overcome the phobia and turn a fearful situation into a good one.

FIGHT THE FEAR

Do the things you fear

Take a ride with your fear

Aim higher than the sun to become

That you act as dead is gone

Cowards die before death tolls

Get knowledge awareness your tools

Self perseverance breath with fear

Stand doing things without care

Make your fear your tools

Walk in the present be cool

Evils that never happens why worry

Only once is life in a hurry

Plan on that you truly fear

Bring not to friendly care

Close eyes for dead troubles unseen

Face that undone before and glean

Salau O John©2010

CHANGING THE WORLD

It’s all part of a process

A step a day for the future

In discipline all must to recess

And action through practice for cure

Its not just words but ways

To learn and live by some rules

To become a man changing days

Lives are interwoven through tools

Every book read, every way known

To stand and become is a process

No one without discipline is shown

And only few had the world restless

Changing the world is mans control

The process is mission, vision holding

But who understands even their soul?

The paths are laid to be reigning

Salau O John©2010

Wishing you all the best in all,

Salau O John

aka

T1

How to Entertain People You Hate: Tips on How to Have a Good Time with Bad Company


Hate the Evil, Hold Fast to the Good: Structuring Romans 12.1-15.1 (Library of New Testament Studies)

Take This Job and Leave It: How to Get Out of a Job You Hate and into a Job You Love

Developing healthy communication skills

Today my friend I'll like to help you out in the most important area of life and living aright.

Just to put you on a straight cause in communicating well in the areas that matters.

We all are made to speak and showcase to the world what and who we are through good communication and well developed manners.

So here I believe you'll be glad to read something of interest to all and sundry.

Developing good communication skills is essential in all walks of life and different situations. Relationships rely on good communication to survive and strengthen, how you live among your neighbors requires good communication, in your work, doing well in school or college and dealing with difficult people are just one of the ways excellent communication skills can help in life.

Most of us have to deal with difficult people at some stage or another in our life, so it is essential that we know how to deal with them effectively, to get the best outcome. If we are faced with difficulties as a common part of our day-to-day life it will gradually have an effect on your life, you will become nervous, anxious and stressed. The easiest solution is to eliminate the difficulty from your life; however this is impossible if the problem lies with a co-worker or a loved one. If this is the case then you have to develop strategies to help you develop healthier communication between you and them. Here are some tips to help you.

1. Where possible avoid getting into any personal discussion such as religion or politics, basically avoid any subject that can easily cause conflict. If you sense the other person is trying to goad you into a discussion that will probably lead to an argument then change the subject or leave the room.

2. Trying to change the difficult person you are dealing with will only result in them becoming defensive; it will eventually turn into a power struggle and make the person even more difficult to deal with.

3. Try changing how you respond or see the other person, if the person is treating you unacceptably then draw boundaries that they cannot cross.

4.  Try to see the other person’s point of view and remember that you are not always right.

5.  Focus on the positive aspects of the other person; this can be especially helpful if the person is a family member.

6.  Accept the person for who they are, good or bad

7.  Learn to recognize when you need to put a distance between you and the other person and act on it when the time comes.

8. When you feel negative interactions try not to blame either one of you for them.

9. If worst comes to the worst then just being polite could be the best you can hope for with certain people, sometimes people just don’t get on, no matter what.

10. Try to keep your sense of humor when around someone who is being difficult.

11. Be sure to have positive relationships around you to offset the negative ones.

These are just a few of the ways which you can use in your daily life when faced with difficult people, while they wont change the person, they can make life and the person involved a lot easier to deal with. Along with developing healthier communication skills you should also practice ways of de-stressing, particularly if you are confronted by facing and dealing with difficult people who you cannot avoid on a daily basis.

QUESTION OR QUESTION

Life and men like solders

To command respect or demand it

The rich is respected even covered

How many understand these roles

The stage had been set here

Servants are commanded to obey

The leader demand respect and fear

But the servants fear only roles

Another leader came to command

But in love everyone obeyed

A friend to servants in regard

Love blossom to enthusiastic work

The question probes hearts alive

Which to follow of two leaders?

Demanding or commanding respect hive

Men knows that to hold brief

Salau O John©2010

To your success,

Salau John (O.O.J)

aka

T1

Messages: The Communication Skills Book 

Business Communication: Building Critical Skills